Use Your Struggles as Fuel to Build the Life You Want

Your feelings are entirely valid—never let anyone convince you otherwise. We are not robots; we are human beings, and our emotions are what make us beautiful and chaotic. Sometimes, those feelings are overwhelming, and at other times, they get the best of us. That’s okay—bad feelings don’t make you weak; they make you human. It is acceptable to experience your emotions; however, it is inappropriate to cause harm to others or to make poor decisions influenced by those feelings.

The world will not stop for you to get over your hurt, frustration, or exhaustion. So take your ten minutes. Cry, scream, punch your pillow, feel it all—and then wipe your face, get up, and pull yourself up by your bootstraps because the hard truth is, no one is coming to save you. There is no magical figure out there waiting to sweep you off your feet, solve all your life dilemmas, pay your bills, heal your heart, or serve you the life you dreamed about on a silver platter.

If you want a good life, you have to fight for it; you have to build it brick by brick, decision by decision, and habit by habit. You need to be your hero, your biggest fan, and sometimes your harshest critic. Waiting indefinitely for things to improve or for someone else to fix it for you is the quickest way to waste time—time you can never reclaim.

Let me clarify: whatever you want in life—peace, success, stability, love, adventure—you are going to have to go out and get it for yourself. No one owes you anything. It is your job to show up and do the work every single day, even when you don’t want to, especially when you don’t want to.

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that if you “stay positive” or “manifest good vibes,” life is going to be easy. Life is designed with unexpected curveballs, often when you’ve got your guard down or you’re least prepared to deal with what is thrown your way. You are going to be slapped down more times than you might have the patience to count. That said, we all fall, and it’s what we do in that moment that makes all the difference. Each of those “stumbles” teaches us something we’ll carry forward with us.

When you fall, you have a choice to make: stay down and cry about how unfair life is, or get back up, acknowledge the pain, learn from it, and keep swinging.

When life throws you a curveball and you can catch it and run with it, you turn what initially looked like a loss into a lesson and, ultimately, a win. You can also just let life knock you flat. Both options hurt, but only one option propels you forward. It is up to you to decide which version of yourself is going to show up if life tests you: the one who folds or the one who fights back.

If you want to cry, then cry. If you’re going to feel all of the feelings, feel them. But never let them weigh you down. Get back up, adjust your thought pattern, and get back to it. No one is coming to give you your life dreams. You can. You, with all of your imperfections, all of your heart, all of your grit, and your tenacity—you can do it. It is always your choice. Choose wisely.